York, UK - The Source of Really White People

We decided to brave the cold and snow and head north of London to the Disneylandish town of York for an overnight trip. We traveled the 210-mile journey on a super fast train, which only took about 2 hours. Pretty sweet, considering a bus takes 5 hours.

To be clear, it seems that only foreign tourists go to York, and they come by the thousands in the summer - practically choking the town. All my guidebooks warned NOT go in the summer. York is apparently on the route of every bus tour that travels through the UK. However, I found it perfectly lovely for a day or two in the winter - despite the cold.

So what's up in York? Well, it has several things going for it in my book (I left out the Jorvik Viking reenactment/village thing, which is wildly popular but I have a feeling it is like a bad Renaissance Fair, and I hate Renaissance Fairs):

• Great food and pubs
• A whole lot of old shit, York is drowning in history: Roman, Celtic, Norman, Viking......
• The most friendly people ever, period (or maybe I am just accustomed to London's big city edge and snootiness)
• The Yorkshire accent, LOVE

Hello Beer Belly
York is a bit of a foodie town. There are adorably tiny butchers, cheese shops, and green grocers everywhere. There are fancy restaurants and twee little pubs built for Hobbit-sized people, including our favorite pub - Pivni. I am an asshole and accidentally ordered a bottled beer from Colorado while we were there. The beer was tasty but I still felt like a total douche. Also, there are too many small gourmet restaurants to count.

Old Stuff
Here is the "list" of what to see/do in York if you only have a day-and-a-half (pictures speak louder than words):

See the Gothic Minster, spectacular and built in the 13th and 14th centuries.

Dave in the Minster, don't miss the carvings and stained glass.

Check out the Castle Ruins, Dave is thrilled.

Hike the 4-mile-long city walls, portions date from Roman times.

Have an old-timey pub lunch, this pub is haunted BTW - and Dave looks possessed.

 

Walk "The Shambles", there has been a market on this street since the 14th century.

See more old castle ruins (I have so many layers on and I am still freezing).

Ponder history at the numerous gates along the city walls.

Friendly People

The Yorkies (is that the right term?) are almost annoying talkative and friendly. EVERYONE we talked to or asked a question of told us everything we wanted to know, and more.....sometimes a lot more, to the point that we had to just start backing away or else we would have been stuck in York forever. Dudes, we only have 36 hours here and I have a lot of beers to taste. 

For example - on our last day, a member of the clergy at this super-old Norman church (photo on the right) invited us inside after mass. The church isn't normally open to the public so we got lucky with our timing. Uhm awesome - 12th century stained glass, gorgeous carvings, dead people under the stones in the floor. On our way out (after our 30 minute lecture on church history from the clergyman), a little old lady thanked us for coming to the church, gave us the same detailed history lesson, then invited us to her house for TEA! We declined because we had a train to catch (luckily?).

Yorkshire Accent
It is difficult to describe the charming York accent (here is an example), it sounds maybe slightly Scottish to my American ears. There is no snootiness to it, which is probably also why everyone in York just sounds friendly. I do know the accent has its roots in old English, and they often exclude the word "the". 

As an Aside
If you watch the accent example video (from the link above) you can see how freaking WHITE that lovely girl (GoAlyBongo) is? Half of York looks like that. I mean, I know white, I have a very Irish family. But holy crap there are a lot of almost transparent people in York. This town is the source of the genetic traits of Boris (my current mayor) and that weirdo monk guy from Princess Bride. Half of York could be in the Twilight movies (OMG I mentioned Twilight, my blog traffic is going to go through the roof)!

Supposedly it is because the Vikings conquered the general area and those are the features they left behind. Whatever, there is a severe vitamin D deficiency going on in this town for sure.

Also, here is GoAlyBongo's commentary on America. I like this chick, she needs move to the U.S. and run for political office. I'd vote for her. My fave: "I would rather shit in my hands and clap than eat Hershey's chocolate." Freaking awesome!

 

Also as an aside, WTF? Is this OK?